Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it turned into a butterfly

Things are starting to get better.

The Girl's surgery went well and without complications. Her follow up appointment is tomorrow and we are hopeful.

I'm getting married in less than a month.

My company had a change of heart and reduced my salary reduction from 20% to 12% - a much more bearable amount to live with. Or without, as the case may be.

I'm getting married in less than a month.

Girlfriend has pulled through her ordeal as well (the one she never blogged about but at least she's blogging again so yea!) and now that it seems to be over I can admit that 1) I was really really fucking scared and 2) I'm a little disappointed her boobs didn't get any bigger.

I'm getting married in less than a month.

I couldn't have said it better myself

When it was done and you went to sleep, I lay awake and listened to the clock on your nightstand and the wind outside and understood that I was really home, that in bed with you was home, and something that had been getting close in the dark was suddenly gone. It could not stay. It had been banished. It knew how to come back, I was sure of that, but it could not stay, and I could really go to sleep. My heart cracked with gratitude. I think it was the first gratitude I've ever really known. I lay there beside you and the tears rolled down the sides of my face and onto the pillow. I loved you then and I love you now and I have loved you every second in between. I don't care if you understand me. Understanding is vastly overrated, but nobody ever gets enough safety. I've never forgotten how safe I felt with that thing gone out of the darkness.

-Lisey's Story, by Stephen King

June is almost as bad as April except no one's died but it's only the 9th so we'll wait and see

To follow up;

The Paperweight was green with envy. However, this has only served to make him even more of an utter ass than he is normally. And we thought it wasn't possible...

But The Boy did graduate from high school Hallelujah! and Amen!
And he had this thing scheduled for this week that would take care of what he was going to do with the rest of his life. However, that too was shot to hell when I spent Saturday night with him in the Emergency Room (in MD, which, as we all know, doesn't take our PA health insurance) and he was diagnosed with a separated shoulder.

The Girl (and while I appreciate all of the advice, if we're to the point that we're being referred to specialists, we are obviously way beyond bubble baths and wiping procedures) has been diagnosed with Vesicoureteral Reflux and is scheduled for surgery and next week.
And on top of that (as if surgery wasn't enough), while I actually went through the process of finding the only in-network urologist in this fucking state to make my crappy ass health insurance happy, I still received a call yesterday stating that the said crappy ass health insurance has deemed it unnecessary and has denied authorization (ie. they won't pay for it).
So if you haven't clicked on the link above, do so now and read all about the permanent kidney damage. And remember that sonogram she had to have? It's already showing that her left kidney has been affected. I wonder what it would take for them to decide it is necessary?
We've decided not to wait and let her right kidney go while we find out and instead I forked over the $600 advance to the doctor. Hospital bill to follow.

Oh, yes, which brings us to my income. While I did survive (so far) and was not one of the 10 people let go by my company recently, I did get, for my decade of self sacrifice and hard work, a 20% pay cut.
No, there is no decimal between those two numbers. I actually said 20%.

I've also been dealing/avoiding an issue with Girlfriend which is not my story to tell, so I won't.
But it's bothering me.
Because I love her.

And I think I caught the damn Swine-Bird-Mad Cow-H1N1 fucking flu at the fucking ER because I woke up Sunday morning with 3 golfballs worth of shit in my throat, ears, and sinuses and it hasn't gone away. Every inch of my body has hurt since then, I've gone threw 2 bags of cough drops, 2 boxes of tissues, Advil by the handful and I have a boo-boo nose.
But do you know what the worst fucking part of it is?
I had tickets to the Nine Inch Nails concert tonight that I've been waiting for forever and I couldn't go because I'm running a fever and will passout shortly after posting this. Seriously, Thing even has The Girl sleeping over at the neighbors because I'm in no condition to do anything.
Except taking large quantities of cold medicine and think about licking Trent Reznor's biceps.....mmmmm......

Beer IQ

Let's see if Bob can get a perfect score on this...

The one where I explain what's been going on and why I drank all the wine

• The Boy had his last day of class and preparations began for his graduation ceremony next week. I will not believe he actually graduated until it's all over and I'm holding his high school diploma in my hand. Don't ask what his plans are after graduation. We have no idea.
• The Paperweight (with 3 Hole Punch) will be visiting our new house for the first time ever so that he can attend The Boy's graduation ceremony with us. I have thereby cleaned, scrubbed, painted, planted, mowed, mulched, dusted and/or remodeled anything that sat still long enough to allow me to do so. That man must be green with envy when he leaves and have no doubt in his mind that The Girl will forever and always be better off with me.
• I've learned that I still have a lot of growing to do.
• I've also discovered that the only thing more adorable than a beautiful blond-haired blue-eyed six year old little girl is a beautiful blond-haired blue-eyed six year old little girl who has lost her two front teeth a day apart. Seriously, you could eat her right up.
• At least you can right after we find out what's causing her UTIs. She's had three in 2 1/2 months and are now dealing with things like urologists and sonograms. I'm too old for this.
• I found a new mole and am headed to the doctor's. Again. I'm too young for this.
• At the beginning of a 4 day heat wave (temperatures of 90 & above), we discoverd our air conditioner was broke.
• My laptop decided it had had enough and could no longer live with it's motherboard thereby forcing me to call Dell Tech Support.
• I had to call Dell Tech Support. Enough said.
• And last, but certainly not least, after 6 weeks of wait and wonder, this is the week I find out if I'm one of the 10-15 employees being let go from my office.

I need more wine.

3 1/2 minutes

So if you've been a regular reader for the last couple years you know that The Thing and I are engaged. If you haven't been, surprise!
I realize I don't talk about it much (ie. ever since it happened) but that's because there isn't a whole lot to talk about. We knew we wanted to get married, we just weren't in an all fire rush to do it. It was never a question of if we'd get married someday, just when.

But we've recently decided when the when would be. While planning our summer vacation, which consists of stops throughout the Midwest & west coast, we planned a stop in Vegas.
Wedding rings have been bought.
However, we suck at the whole secret part of the eloping thing and pretty much everyone will know we are getting married before we go.

The Thing, of course, wanted to tell his parents personally before it got back to them from someone else. So yesterday, while we were there visiting, he made the big announcement.

I think we set a new record. It took exactly 3 1/2 minutes between the words "Fauve and I are getting married" to leave The Thing's mouth and when his dad started talking about us having kids.
Oy vey

You would think computer nerds would know better

So have you seen the new feature of the Google Toolbar? The one in which when you open a new tab it shows your top 6 most visited websites?

For my convenience...

So, who in their right fucking mind thought this was a good thing to do? Just because certain websites are my "Favorites" doesn't mean I want anyone standing behind me, or who borrows my laptop, to know these are the websites I go visit everyday....
And to make matters worse, clearing your 'History' does not change what shows up on this Toolbar. It seems that the only way I may be able to get rid of it is to uninstall Google toolbar all together. Which I hesitate to do, since I like all of it's other features.
Seriously, what fucktards.

And yes, as a matter of fact when this feature was first added 4 of my 6 most visited that showed up were porn.
What's it to you?
Shuttup.