Need get well vibes

My sweetie Eduardo has been in bed all week with what we thought was the flu. A trip to the doctor's today says he has pnuemonia. Every loving maternal fiber in my body wants to go pamper him and feed him soup. He won't let me, though, saying he doesn't want to pass it to me or through me to the kids.

:sigh:

My weekend (finally, because deadlines suck)

Took long enough, eh? Sorry about that, especially since I've been dying to bubble and be all girly. Let's start at the beginning...

Eduardo met me at my office Friday after work so that he could follow me home. He, of course, had never been to my place before. Plus, I live more then an hour outside of town, so this was just the easiest way to do it. He arrived in my parking lot carrying an iced coffee he had bought me from Starbucks on his way over - the same drink I bought at the coffee shop on our last date. Bonus points for Eduardo being both thoughtful and actually remembering what I like. (The Paperweight still commented after more then a decade 'you take your coffee black?!?!' Duh, only for like forever)

Fast forward through the boring commute home...

Eduardo liked my house, commented on my beautiful yard (I love to garden), and gave me losts of smooches because we had the house to ourselves for a little while. The Paperweight arrived after picking up The Girl at Preschool and everyone was introduced to everyone else and we even ate dinner (pizza) together before leaving for the game. The Paperweight felt out Eduardo while we ate and later deemed him 'okay' and said he only got good vibes from him. The Girl was silent the majority of the time, which is actually astoundingly good for her, because 1) she didn't cry and 2) she stayed in the room the whole time instead of hiding in her bedroom. After dinner, Eduardo and I left for The Boy's football game.

Fast forward through the football game because there isn't anything exciting to tell, especially since we lost...

The Boy and Eduardo got along fine, The Boy telling me he was 'cool' the next day. Then finally, the kids are in bed, and Eduardo and I have some time alone. And it occurs to me that this is the first time a man, other then my husband of numerous years, is in my bed, spending the night... And I decided, I really really liked it.

Fast forward through, uh, stuff... yada yada yada and all that... Let's just say, it turns out, that Eduardo and I are very compatible in even more ways then we orginally thought...

I made sure to be awake before The Girl the next morning because I didn't know how she'd react to this new guy in mom's bed. Turns out, she didn't care much that he was there, however, she never saw Eduardo and I in bed together so that would've probably been a different story. So The Girl and I did our morning routine until 'those sleepy head boys' finally woke up. The four of us had breakfast together and it was very nice, and a lot more comfortable then I thought it would be. The Girl was completely smitten with Eduardo; he couldn't leave the room without her asking where he was, what he was doing, and when he was coming back. LOL And she dragged out her crayons and her Preschool homework, which we usually don't do until Sunday, and asked Eduardo to help her. Which he did.

So at one point on Saturday morning, I was in my kitchen getting another cup of coffee, and I looked up to see Eduardo and The Girl at the dining room table doing 'homework'. She was very comfortable with him, and he with her. And I thought, oh how very lucky I am.

Crazy deadline...

I'll be back later, hopefully this afternoon, to fill you in on my weekend. In the meantime, I leave you with this 'thought':

Today's thought is:
Today I will be grateful for where I am now.

My life might not be perfect, and I might not have achieved the goals I thought I would have by now; I might not be living the kind of life I thought I would be or want to be, but I'm grateful for this day, right now, and the fact that I've made a commitment to myself to live a life in which I'm treated with respect and dignity.

I will use this day as a gift, one that I've given myself because I deserve it. I will use this day to be glad for all I've accomplished.

I'm deserving, worthy, and valuable.

I'm a lovable person, and today I thank the person who helped me understand this: me

Eduardo can never meet my sister

I made the decision to have Eduardo spend Friday night at my house after the football game. I did this for a couple reasons; it would be a long drive late at night for him to get back home, it would give him and both kids a chance to get to know each other on Saturday, give Eduardo a chance to see the maternal side of me (one thing that was always a huge turn-off for The Paperweight. In retrospect, I think The Paperweight was much to selfish and jealous to be a father), and also simply because I really wanted Eduardo to spend the night with me...

The Girl is extremely shy. Now, I say this to people and they think they understand. Oh no...when I say shy, I mean SHY. As in, she was almost three years old before she'd let her grandparents come any where near her. Shy, as in, I've seen her eat entire meals with her eyes closed because we had company. The mere sight of my brothers still brings her to tears until they leave. Yeah, shy. So I, of course, wanted to prepare The Girl for the 'stranger' that would be at our house on Saturday. I told her simply that a friend of mine would be visiting. She responded the same way she always responds when we have company over, with a resounding, "no, I don't want him here". After much discussion, which was getting me no where, I asked if she would like to see a picture of him, thinking if Eduardo was no longer an 'unknown' figmant perhaps she'd at least consider not freaking out. This tactic has worked in the past, but only rarely.

Yes, The Girl said, she'd like to see his picture. So I took The Girl to my bedroom where I keep a picture of Eduardo on a top shelf. (oh, shut-up. i already admitted to being completely smitten). The look on The Girl's face when I lifted her up to picture level was priceless and I had to bite the insides of my cheeks to keep from smiling. The Girl was completely smitten at first sight; her face containing the cutest, coy-est smile I have ever seen in my life. I held her there for a moment then turned to set her feet back on the ground and she yelled, 'wait! I'm not done yet!'

I think I peed my pants a little.

The Girl stared for another minute and then shyly turned to me and asked, 'can I show him my Dora stuff when he comes over?'

Girlfriends are the best

There are many poems, cards, and funny emails that are widely circulated regarding 'girlfriends'. I think none of them capture the true essence or the true importance of them. Men will come and go, family will disown you, and even your own children will eventually move away and start a life of their own. But girlfriends? Ah, that's something different. True girlfriends are with you through thick and thin, know your dirty little secrets and always, especially when it really counts, tell you the truth.

Things with Eduardo have continued to progress nicely. He is meeting me at my office this afternoon, following me home, and we will attend The Boy's football game together tonight. This means, of course, that he will be meeting The Boy. I've been terribly excited all week at the thought of seeing him again. This week has dragged on so long…and the anticipation had me completely flustered. At least, this was the case until yesterday morning.

Yesterday morning I became completely terrified. I felt like a lead weight was in my stomach and I couldn't think straight for worry and nervousness. I posted previously, all be it briefly, about my fear regarding my relationship with Eduardo. I kept thinking, "Okay, this is going way too well. He can't possibly be this nice. So what the hell is wrong with him?" I kept, quite frankly, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Finally, I contacted a girlfriend of mine and spewed forth all of these thoughts.

After quietly and thoroughly listening to me, like only a girlfriend can, she said to me, "You do realize, after what you've been through, that your fears are completely justified, right?"
::me feeling all smugly justified::
"Now get the fuck over it.", she says.
::me mouth agape::
"This is the first time in almost a decade that you can honestly say you are happy. Just enjoy it and quit trying to ruin it."
"Me? Ruin it? Why would I do that?"
"Because you don't remember how to be happy. You're out of practice. So it's your call: Learn how to be happy again and enjoy this man or be a fearful wench who will end up all clingy and insecure…and we both know how much guys love that. So I say, get the fuck over it and be happy or give me his phone number."

Like hell I will…..

And now a word from our Sponsor

I have fallen in love with this stuff and have been meaning to praise it's name - just haven't gotten around to it until now. However, I must note that I did not use the nasal spray pictured above (I just couldn't find any other picture). I used the chewables.
Many people at the office have been sick, and of course they insist on coming to the office and making everyone else sick as well. I could feel the sniffles starting on Friday, right before the big date with The-New-And-Improved-Eduardo. I had heard this product mentioned so I stopped on the way home and grabbed a box. I figured, I'd try anything because if I woke up the next morning sick...I was going to be one happy (i.e. bitchy) lady.

I will tell you that this stuff tastes like absolute shit and will leave a shitty taste in your mouth for long periods of time requiring you to brush and gargle numerous times. However, it works. I had nothing more then a mild sniffle the entire next day, which was banished by a daytime cold medicine. Everyone else at work has required at least two days off work due to their colds, but I still have nothing more then the occassional need to blow my nose.

smitten kitten

Yep, I've been completely swept off my feet. The New Eduardo (the artist formerly known as Eduardo #3) is completely amazing in every way. Our lunch date Friday got cancelled because he had to go in to work for a few hours. However, he wrote me the most romantic note and we already had plans for a date on Saturday, so I was okay with it.

We met for our date Saturday at 2:30pm; spent the day at a festival, had a long talk at a coffee shop, a late dinner, and then went to a bar for a few drinks and to hear a couple bands. And a friend of his was in one of the bands so I was introduced to her and a few of his other friends that night. We then went back to his place for some soft music and snuggling. We did a lot of talking, kissing, laughing and even a little dancing. I got home 11am Sunday morning and I can honestly say I've never had a better time in my entire life.

I feel like a kid on Christmas morning!

And it terrifies me.

::rubbing Karamia's head::

The question I've been asked most often this week by my friends has been "does he have a brother?" lol (yes, as a matter of fact he has two. Unfortunetly, they're both married). Since our date, we've talked on the phone twice and exchanged at least a dozen emails. It only took him until Monday afternoon to ask me out again; lunch this Friday. There has never been a slower week in the history of my life.

In other news:
The Boy has done wonderfully at football. Last Friday's Varsity Game, they put him in even though he is only a sophmore. Not only did they stick him in at the end of the second quarter, but he played the entire second half; both on the offense and defensive lines. We won 67-14. His first Junior Varsity game was the next morning. He didn't play as much or as well though because he was still exhausted and pretty beat up from the night before. We still won though, 32-12.

I've joined the Football Boosters and attended my first meeting last night; officially making me a football mom. I think I felt the last of my youth slip away on the drive there, but it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. In any event, I know I'll always be the youngest (and thereby cutest) mom there. They, of course, could smell fresh meat and I've already been snagged for volunteer duty. I get to sell 50/50 tickets at this Friday's game. The Boy has forbidden me to embarrass him in any way. Party pooper.

The Girl is on a mischievous rampage and I think I would sell her if she wasn't so damn cute. However, if she steals the maple syrup to use in her kitchen set one more time and continues to use her new bedding set as the table cloth while serving her maple syrup dinners, you will see her on Ebay.

Eduardo #3

As much as I'd love to post a picture to show you what a cutie he is, I can't in good conscience. But picture in your minds Owen Wilson after a nose job with the bluest of blue eyes.

You want details? Okay, but no mocking my sappy girly attitude or I will be forced to sing a rather bad rendition of Wind Beneath my Wings. Loudly. And I'd do it too!

Though we met in an entirely different part of town, it was very similar in structure to the date with Eduardo #1. Met in a central public place with lots of restaurants, shops, bars, coffee houses, etc. to give us many options of where we wanted to go and do. This place has free concerts in the summer as well so we knew we'd also have the option of listening to some bands.

I must admit, I'm completely smitten. This is going to sound completely sexist but it's the truth - I had no clue that guys like this actually existed outside of chick flicks. He has a shy boyish charm, warm and friendly. He's witty and honest. And very sweet and caring.

We had coffee, we walked, we had dinner and a couple drinks. But mostly what we did was talk. We talked for hour upon hour and I didn't get home until 2 am. We totally 'clicked' and both enjoyed ourselves. And as the night went on, you could almost see the electricity between us. Oh, and did I mention that he's shy?
He was a total gentleman….which only made him more attractive to me. Six hours into the date where we had this obvious connection and yet he hadn't so much as laid a finger on me. (yes, you heard that correctly. six hours. and the night wasn't over yet) He admitted his total nervousness, which is how we ended up having a couple drinks after dinner. And as I sat across the table looking at him as we talked, I knew there was no way I was letting him go this night without us kissing.
After our drinks, we wandered back to the little park area to see if any bands were still playing. As we walked the little garden path beside the restaurant to the park talking, I knew I had to kiss this man. I stopped walking and he got a step in front of me. I reached out my arm to stop him and then gently pulled him towards me.

The first kiss. Such an important role it plays on a date. Two people can get along wonderfully, but that doesn't mean there will be that spark. And it's not just a matter of how good a person kisses, though that is important, but also a matter of…well, you know, spark. Anyway, our first kiss on the garden path under the stars….
After careful thought on how to describe what happened, I think probably the best way is to tell you the thought that actually went through my mind while we kissed; "How have I managed to get through my entire life without kissing this man?"

Then he took my hand, which he held the entire night thereafter, and we continued down the path. The bands were gone but we sat on a bench by a fountain and talked for another two hours.

First date with Eduardo #3 was last night

Perfection.

Eduardos #1 & #2 don't even come close...

My first drunk post

assuming I can finish this. The letters keep moving around on the keyboard on me. It's Friday! And yes, I was drinking at lunch (take note, where I work "drinking at lunch" means "went to the bar and had numerous beers and no food was involved").

But I wanted to give a quick catch up/run down of where things are:
1. I have an official date with Eduardo #3 tomorrow. I hope he's as adorable in person as he is on the phone and via the internet.
2. The Paperweight has started being, well, a paperweight when it comes to The Boy. He's only made it to one football game so far. Tonight was his turn to go again and he's backed out. again. So The Girl and I will be going. I haven't missed a game yet. Though The Paperweight has been to one game so far, which is an improvement, believe it or not. The Boy played basketball for two years and The Paperweight didn't go to a single game.
3. For those who are curious, yes I am still seeing Eduardo #1. Nothing has happened to him. I'm just 'playing the field'. lol After being tied to The Paperweight for sooo long, I love saying that.
4. For those who are also curious about Eduardo #2, I have not heard a peep out of him since our date last Thursday. Yes, I've tried contacting him. No, I have not gotten a hold of him. Yes, I am upset. But that's only due to pride. I'm considering demoting him from Eduardo #2 to Buttwipe.
5. Wilma emailed me Tuesday. We knew she was scheduled for knee surgery this month and even The Paperweight said she'd contact me before-hand because, well, who else would take care of her? As much as I hate to say it, he was right. Wilma's need for self-preservation won the battle. She mentioned not a word of the fight, any of the mean things she said to me, or the fact that she's ignored me for weeks. Just a "My surgery is soon. Come see me before I croak." Yeah, guilt much? No, I have not emailed her back and I'm not going to. If I wasn't good enough to be her daughter when I needed help in my life, then I'm not good enough to be her daughter when she needs help.

Okay....I need a cup of coffee...I still have a football game to go to tonight! Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

I'm a big fat liar

Yes, I promised to post on Friday after my date with Eduardo #2. Not only didn't I tell you all about him and the date, but I didn't post at all for several days. Instead, selfish wench that I am, I escaped the dreary rain and 60 degree weather of the 'Burgh and went to the shores of New Jersey where it was sunny and 80 degrees. As you all waited with bated-breath on what could possibly happen next in my life, my ass was sitting in a beach chair.

To make me even more annoying, I've decided that I'm not ready to not tell you about Eduardo #2 yet. Except to say…he's wonderful and the date went very well.

But if it makes you feel any better, I'm still cleaning sand out of various body cavities.

And to try to make it up to you, I'll tell you about the potential Eduardo #3. He's not officially an Eduardo yet because we haven't had our first date. Like Eduardo #1, I met him through an online dating service. We've been exchanging emails and have our second phone call planned for this evening. I expect us to meet this weekend; assuming we can work out our schedules.
Like Eduardos #1 & #2, Eduardo #3 works in the education field. And like the other two, he is well educated himself (though #3 is only working on his Masters, while #1 & #2 are working on their Doctorates. I think I'm becoming a bit of an education snob) and very attractive.
The one major difference between #3 and the others…is that he has Boyfriend Potential. He's not commitment phobic, he's old enough to have already figured out what he wants out of life, and I think he's looking to get out of the dating scene and settle down with someone he's comfortable with. Of course, these are just my initial impressions and I could be completely wrong. Which is why I'm still in touch with him instead of running screaming in to the night. Well, that….and he's really cute and really really nice.

Yes, yes...there is more. Isn't there always? But I haven't made my blog rounds in almost a week and I need to go catch up before the withdrawl shakes get any worse.