A thin line between forgiveness and calling someone a fat fuck
Most people know by now that Facebook is a cultural phenomenon. It enables you to connect with friends, at anytime, at any location around the world that has an Internet connection. It also helps you find and reconnect with any "old" friends you may have lost touch with over the years. The downfall is, Facebook also helps old "friends" reconnect with you.
Sitting in my inbox is a message that my very first boyfriend has added me as a Friend and I need to confirm or deny this. And as I no longer trust my social skills due to emotional scarring over the years once again you, dear Internet friends, are going to make this decision for me.
Things To Think About: 1. This was my very first boyfriend (who shall be called VFB here on out. I thought of many other variations of many other names but opted out so I can't be accused of needlessly influencing my audience.) As you already know (if you've read the 100 Things About Me list) VFB dumped me after a few months because he said I gave bad blowjobs.
A. We were 14 years old. Are there many 14 year olds who give good blowjobs? Personally, I think that would attest to my non-whore status and faithfulness to him
2. While this caused a lot of reactions in me and in my life, two were major enough that they still effect my daily life to this day.
A. VFB was the start of my emotional and relationship downfall; my love/hate relationship with men. My belief that all men really want is sex and my wrongful determination to equate sex with love.
B. I spent the next 20 years becoming the Queen of BJ's and learning to give the best damn head in the world. Thus by:
i. Giving up my non-whore status (I needed the practice)
ii. Making The Thing one very very happy man
The Thing, when I first told him about VFB being in my Inbox, hi-fived me. He wants to leave a bunch of Pro-BJ comments on my Wall for VFB (and everyone else apparently) to see. But then, because I have this whole "wanting to be a better person" thing going on, the discussion began.
Why is VFB asking to be my 'Friend'? We never spoke again after the break up - 20 years ago.
Does VFB even remember what happened? Would it be appropriate to ask him?
Do I just hit Deny and avoid the whole situation?
Do I Friend him? Then what? Wait and see what he says? Let it go after 2 fucking decades and pretend like nothing happened? Do I let him know all of the above in the hope of purging this demon? Or do I simply call him a fat fuck and revel in the immature satisfaction of it?
posted by ƒåυνέ @ 8:42 AM
11 Comments:
Ignore the fat fuck
your ace and he obviously has no friends
in case you missed it your ace :)
I vote for the last one. You don't owe him anything and it would make you feel better. Give yourself a little gift. Tell him off and then let it go.
PS. Definitely don't tell him the impact he's had on you. That gives him too much credit.
I agree with ignorning him...he's not worth the benefit of the doubt. Even if he doesn't know the emotional baggage you carry from your relationship with him, you know it and it will be there for you in any correspondance you have with him.
Good riddance to him.
Deny, Deny, Deny... he's not worthy!
If he's a creep like I suspect, he probably doesn't remember. I'd ignore the "friend" request.
Just a short story:
I am also on FB and had a girl who had been basically my arch-nemesis for several years friend me. She and I really get along pretty well now that we're quite a bit older (about 18 years older-ish).
So it might not be all bad. We don't talk about old times, but we do talk about everything else.
Oh yeah, and it would give you an opportunity to snoop and see that he turned into nothing special and make yourself feel good because not only did you not end up with him, you ended up becoming a KQ (Kielbasa Queen). You rock!
Fauvie...there's not a reason in this world why you should acknowledge his existence... unless you want to purge demons. It might be a great way to pull out that fork that he somehow managed to stick in your craw.
Besides you can always delete him right?
p.s..damn!!!
Ok.. I've only read down to A: and I'm already pissing my pregnant pants.
So very much looking forward to some more...
ANd I dont' even care what you reasoned next... HIT YES. VFB needs to know about your skillz learned over the years. Inferred or not!!! YOu must!
Y'know, I've had very similar things happen to me on FB. Why do people who weren't my friend in high school/ college/ real life feel the need to friend me on FB? Just because they recognize my name? Totally weird phenomena.
Since he friended you, you can take a look around his profile and wall and such....get a feeling what he is like now. He'll never know and you can decide what you want to do from there. I'm on the fence about you friending him back. He was a big ass to you way back when but then isn't most males at that age. I know my first boyfriend was.
Ignore him. That'll make him squirm more.
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